Sunday, May 13, 2012

Happy Birthday

Dear Quinn and Logan,
I figured since I am belated in writing my annual birthday letter to you, I may as well just be even a few days later and write this to you on Mother’s Day, since I wouldn’t be celebrating this day without you two. Could it be possible to love and admire you two any more? Perhaps, but it is hard to imagine. Once again, this past year has been filled with absolute wonder, joy, and surprise. Last year we were celebrating your birthdays in Paris, this year we’re back home, but that Paris flame is still flickering and the imprint of our three months there has definitely shaped the young men you are still blossoming into. Maybe it had to do with living in a small apartment, or maybe it’s a true sign of your maturing, but whatever the reason, there is a settling into your skin that we’ve witnessed in you two this past year.

We know that being twins has it challenges and we figured that eventually, what outsiders marvel at, would one day become apparent to you. Up until this year there was more competition and an edginess that defined your twin-ship. This year you’ve really grown in your self-awareness and confidence and individuality and it seems that you two are able to recognize that walking through this world as a twin can be an asset rather than a hindrance. Of course, I fully expect that when you read that you’ll disagree and possibly roll your eyes, but I’m here to tell you that the softening between you two is palpable. You are each more willing to let the other complete a sentence without needing to finish it, you are allowing each other the space to be individuals and as a result you seem to enjoy some of the pleasures of being a twin. Or maybe it has less to do with joy and more to do with the fact that you can finally play identity tricks on your teachers and schoolmates. Yes, those stories trickle back to us, and we can’t believe it took you two this long to realize the fun you could have with being identical. Regardless, it has been such a joy to witness your growth in confidence and the joy of discovering your interests as individuals.

This has been a year of transitions for sure. You started high school this year after being gone from your classmates last year. The transition to school and the craziness that goes along with classes, homework, and sports has seemed to be much easier for you than it was for me and dad. Perhaps we are less resilient to change, but I feel as if I’m just settling into your school routines, and oh my god, school’s almost done! Don’t worry, that’s just my lag-time parenting, which has pretty much been my modus operandi since your birth.  I would like to think that I’m one step ahead of you two, but I’ll share my little secret now—you’ve already lapped me twice!

While we are incredibly proud of your scholastic achievements, we are more proud of your kind and loving spirits. You two are empathetic to others and will lend a hand or word of encouragement when needed. These are the traits that will truly matter in life, and you are both off to a great start.

I still freak out at the thought of being an “empty-nester” in only a few short years, but I’m also excited to see what directions you begin to steer your lives.  These next few years will be filled with major life decisions, and the fact that you’ve already begun to give voice to the directions you want to take and are willing to make some sacrifices now in order to end up where you want to be just reminds us yet again of your maturity. Most fifteen year olds still can’t correlate cause and effect, but you two seem to have a very clear understanding of the decisions you make now and how they’ll affect your future. We honestly couldn’t ask for more. We love you beyond measure and while I will absolutely accept you cooking me a meal for Mother’s Day, I feel it is me who should celebrate you. Happy (belated) birthday my darlings and thank you for giving me the gift of motherhood.